Monthly Archives: January 2019

5 years changes almost everything


The last time I posted on my blog was 5 years and 2 months ago, my son was 12 my daughter was 5, I was married, had recently moved back to El Pass Tx  my husband had came home from Afghanistan, I had 1 cat,  I was studying photography, and planning a return to El paso Texas, I had never built or redone a piece of furniture, and I had no idea how to draw blood or give an IV, but that was 5 years ago and none of that is the same. What is the same…I love my kids, I love crafting and creating, and I’m a stay at home mom, I still have a penchant for reality TV, big sunglasses, diet Coke and the beach..I still enjoy reading and writing still helps me destress.

My blog started getting neglected when my husband returned and I moved back, and it was just downhill from there with all the rapid changes in my life

I think the easiest way to give some insight and do a little catching up is a timeline

In November 2013, I realized the building we moved into had cockroaches, it took me a single day to sanitize, pack an entire home, move it all into storage and move my family into a hotel.. If you can’t tell by reading that, I do not do cockroaches!

In January 2014 we relocated to JBLM in Washington.. This made me so happy because if you were a reader before or have scanned though, I hated hell paso as I called it, it was so nice to finally have green and trees and fresh air, and I was so excited to be by the ocean

Shortly after moving I realized that the beaches while beautiful are really a cruel joke since they are freezing and have rip tides pretty much rendering them useless for swimming

In February 2014 my dad moved from New York and in with us..I was super happy to have family with me, my dad and I have always been really close

In the end of August beginning of September I went on a camping trip with friends that ultimately changed my life completely, it was the catalyst for my new relationship, but let me be clear when I say it was not the catalyst for my divorce, there were a whole other set of circumstances that made that happen

It was then that I knew I couldn’t fight for us anymore, too much had happened, too many things hadn’t changed. It wasn’t until November of that year that I finally called it

In December 2015 I moved to my own place with my dad and my boyfriend, a man I had known for years without ever really knowing him.. Until then, I was truly happy for the first time in a long time

We were both going through divorces, his wife had moved his kids 18 hours away and my kids had moved with me, and that’s honestly how I thought that would stay

But alas life has a funny way of not being predictable, and it was only a few months later in April that he knew he’d be asking for custody and I knew I was going to do everything in my power to help him make it happen because we truly believed that was what was best for the kids

In December and January I also attended college to get a certificate in phlebotomy, I really enjoyed it and did really well, it was after it was over that I found out I wouldn’t be able to get certified because I was on narcotics for chronic pain

In July 2015 his 3 children moved in with us they were, 2, 5 and 6 and things started moving so quickly, it wasn’t long before I was in the Mom role, there were many ups and downs and twists and turns

All 3 of the children had behavioral issues, the oldest worse than the others and it changed my life significantly, it added a lot of stress, and took up a lot of my time

I’m September of 2015 his divorce was finalized as well as the custody agreement which was a relief because the amount of ups and downs throughout the months before this were insane, we had dealt with so much regarding the ex, the divorce and the custody

In December 2015 my dad decided to go back to New York, handling chaotic children that had a lot of behavioral issues didn’t work well for him, it made me sad but I understood

We went through a lot, systems, talks, behavioral health appointments, being a bonus mom wasn’t easy, that’s for sure, but it was worth it

In February 2016 I got to  meet my boyfriend’s Grandma, Grandpa and one of his brothers, I had met his parents in July when we picked up the kids, and it didn’t surprise me at all that I really liked them all, and so much stress was taken away from me when I knew they liked me too.. They had always hated his ex wife, and I was always worried they wouldn’t like me.

In April 2016 he got out of the army, at the time I was thrilled because I hated the sacrifices that came with being with someone in the military, we then went through the struggles of transitioning between military and civilian life

It was almost a year before he was able to get a job

It was shortly after he got out that we decided to let his oldest move back in with his mother, she seemed to be in a much better place, and his behavior was out of control, taking so much attention from the other kids in our home, and he wanted to live with her, it seemed as though he hated me, mostly because I had rules and he hated those, we had tried so many things and nothing worked… Today we have a great relationship so I’m thankful for how it all worked out

In February 2017 he started his job as a truck driver..I hated that he was taking this job and spoiler alert I still hate it now.. He’s gone so often

In March 2017 we found out the people who owned the house we were renting were selling and we had to move

In May 2017 we became the owners of a brand new build 5 bedroom home, that we fell in love with when we first seen it.  We would later fall out of love with it, but that’s a whole other story

In June of 2017 I started having severe pain in my right leg, unable to put weight on it, nothing stopped the pain, living with it became an every day battle, there were times I seriously wanted to hack it off, it was also this month that my divorce was finally finalized

In July 2017 I got engaged

In January 2018 I found out my sciatic nerve was pinched, a prior MRI after my back surgery had showed it was only touching

It wasn’t until March of 2018 that I finally had my 2nd back surgery, a partial discectomy at L5S1 (lower back) the  Surgery went well, the doctor said my nerve had ended up pinched and partially sitting on top of my disc, the results were amazing, my leg pain was gone from the minute I woke up in recovery, and because I had been in pain for so long the pain associated with the surgery itself seemed like nothing, it was actually hard to remember to take it easy because I felt so good.

In May 2018 we decided we were going to put our house on the market, it took much longer than we originally thought but

Finally in November 2018 it was posted for sale, we were looking into moving about an hour a way, closer to the coast, but now even that’s changed.. Stay tuned for more on that

And that about catches us up.. Honestly with all of the things thrown at us and things we went through in such a small amount of time it’s crazy that we lasted, but the truth is.. We chose each other, and we kept choosing each other through it all

A few days ago we got an offer on our house, we counter offered and they accepted so now we are in a whole new stage of house sales

Yesterday we found out that his grandma died… And my heart hurts, but I also feel blessed that I got a chance to not only meet her but know her, that means a trip to California is imminent, a time to say goodbye, the timings horrible, with so much going on and having to be out of our house in 24 days but I guess there never really is a good time.. And missing a chance to say goodbye and mourn would be so much worse than having things be a little more hectic.